As for him changing, the only person we can control and change in life is ourselves. I love him too much still to do that to him, but I am so deeply unhappy and I am resentful. I knew he did it, and knew he was lying to me. Could you get the trailer moved when he is not around onto someone elses land? I love him but I’m not in love with him and when I tell him he just goes around it and makes me feel bad but for some reason I can’t seem to leave him because he depends on me and I don’t want to see him messed up. He doesn’t like to do anything that involves going out and being with friends and family all he cares about is where I’m at and how long I’m out. it hurts to see him this way but i know that i have literally looked in the eye for 14 years and cry to him almost every weekend for the hurt he makes me feel…and he doesnt care. Hi there. I have never had a guy to say the things that he did. I want to tell all the women/men out there who have a similar situation like mine,that the world is not over YET they should dry up their tears and contact this great man and their problem will be gone or are you also having other problems you can also contact Dr Alexzander, here is how you can contact him via [2347068836760] or contact him via his whatsapp phone number +2348075823891. Getting Over a Breakup - Why Do I Feel So Bad When I Chose to Leave? We’d imagine if you translated all the time spent fighting, doing all the planning and cooking, etc, into taking care of yourself, you’d be just fine, and could manage all the admin of a breakup step-by-step and day-by-day. belief. No doubt about it. We’d suggest you do some research on what’s called codependency, and codependent relationships. he does whatever he wants. I know this is not healthy. It’s not been 4 years and I’ve had a fair amount of opportunities to leave but I can’t bring myself to do it. Love portion After i and my ex husband got divorced, i had another chance to re-marry again and just 5 years of my second marriage there was another divorce which almost killed me emotionally. But there are several other interesting things here. He often says he will do something and then fail to keep is word on a number of things from small to large scale. If after divorce, will a relationship with this old friend be successful? My partner was very controlling and emotionally abusive for 18 months and this then escalated to a short but very destructive 3 months where he was also physically abusive. So please don’t be hard on yourself for finding it hard to leave. Before I met him I was very active and social. Even though I was being cheated on I was completely infatuated with that person. I’m in a unhappy relationship. And it is really important to get help if you are feeling really unhappy. How were you shown love growing up? I feel guilty for leaving him, I feel 4 years is a long time, i feel at my age 41 I'm not going to find someone else, and he is good to my son. Humans are social beings by nature and are wired to seek the company of others, looking for comfort, happiness and fulfillment. Use the search bar to find our articles on trauma bonding. I fucked my ex!!" Because you are enough, and you are loveable, and you likely love this man very much but have lost your connection with how to show it. And is the relationship the only problem at the moment, is it really the root of any dissatisfaction you currently feel? Theres also the EFT technique, it is very simple and you can try that one on your own. I want to be happy again. What he would do to them etc.He complains about not having enough sex and I understand that and try to do my best to sexually appease him. It’s not sexual, it’s more emotional. We can’t live our entire lives not doing so. I want to get better but I think it is impossible if he remains here. The levels of guilt and codependency in this mail are high, and this combo makes it very hard to see ways forward for the best of us. We went to the hospital several times for checkup and the Doctor kept telling us that we are medically fine, i Could not help our situation anymore so i had to do a research on the internet and there i found testimony of people testifying about how Lord Bubuza help them. He does love me and really tries to make me happy. I can see the potential in him and hes a good person and when he stays sober, hes everything i want him to be. Please read our articles on the victim mentality http://bit.ly/stopbeingvictimized. I found out that my husband has been unfaithful throughout the early years of my marriage and I don’t trust him anymore. Hi, You teach leadership and social responsibility at a school, yet you can profess this on a psychology board? We don’t know the difference or what love and a healthy relationship really is because it was never modelled to us by the adults around us when were a kid. When we are broke I go looking for cigarette butts or bum one or bum money to get him a pack. I am a lesbian. Because you are enough, and you are loveable, and you likely love this man very much but have lost your connection with how to show it. These are all valid reasons to end the relationship. Is this a case of us saying ‘just see a therapist’ just because we are a therapy company? Arguments and screaming is just a norm. Are you in the UK? I guses I feeling low at moct beased me and my dad don't get on each other. I took him back cause I loved him and he went to a psychologist and he was okay for a few weeks, but we argue a lot cause he doesn't like my job, I'm a realtor and I'm always talking and I'm very social but that's is who I'm, I love my job, it has provided for me and my son, but he is always putting my job down. He would leave me(pregnant) and my kid(not his) home all the time. I have also in this time built a fantastic relationship with his mother and sister, which in turn makes things more difficult because they’re about all I have for family, so I’m scared I’m goi to lose them too. At moments in the relationship when we were unstable and depressed, he cheated on me, for a total of 3 times. This can look like bullying or pushing a partner or trying to control a relationship, all done with the best of intentions because all we really want is to be loved for who we are. every time he messed up he tries to make it up but doing something like that. I was the enemy and her friend all the same time. 9 Major Signs And Symptoms Of An Unhappy Relationship 1. Your relationship was already unstable before all this with major problems by the sounds of it. For example, a prenuptial agreement, a written document with a great binding power, is an obstacle that you can’t really change or influence, but fear of financial insecurity can be remedied by getting a job or downsizing. I dont want to walk away because I feel like it isnt fair that this is happening even thou everyday we fight about the issues that came up an I’m called every name in the book an he tells me he isnt even actuated to me an he never was that he is gonna leave me once he get his settlement. Sounds like a classic case of rushing into a relationship without knowing someone then getting to know them and having to realise 1) you don’t know them as well as you thought 2) you might not have as much in common as you thought. Adam, we are sorry to turn the tables here, but we want to challenge if you are asking the right questions here. When I realize that our relationship has become equally disheartening to my wife (whom I love deeply, is an amazing human being, and undoubtedly loves me deeply as well), I am further convinced that I am making the right decision as difficult as it may be. We wish you courage! I lived in a house on the west side of Detroit a house with no water no electricity no heat. We built a lot of things together, have many pets and things we can’t really split if we were to break up. Wow, Family_Man is touchy. I wanted to be happy. Well if both couples are very compatible with one another and love each other for who they really are which there is a very good chance that the relationship will work, especially if they're very committed as well. I just want to be me again and live my life the way it should be. What advice can you give me? Finally, have you discussed this with your therapist? One part being how my spouse at the time would treat me. He went to the hospital several times. I don’t know what to do. The irony is that they have made this the norm. Our brains can be patterned to go back to what they know, even if it is not for our best wellbeing. I have always been independent, I'm in sales and I raised my son alone since he was 3 now he is 17 years old, never received child support or any help from the government cause I was making too much, but sales were slow at times. Her attitude was always ‘you knew what you were marrying’. We cant’ tell you ‘how to be happy again’, as we all have our own definition of what happiness is and it’s only you who can make you happy again through starting to make good choices for yourself. That is up to you. Such as someone who has mental/emotional deficiencies. Proper support, not just friends. Saying sexual things to women at his job whenever he works anywhere and online. This is despite what most would recognize as an unhappy marriage. An then again he assumes I cheated on him when I had become distant from him an was flirting with a guy at work for a month in a half. As for leaving her everything, that sounds like a choice made from guilt. Any tips on dealing with guilt, or do we need to listen to it? At this point im only staying because I have no where else to go. Hello. Moving back in with his mother is not going to make it any better. I told him why wouldn’t we just continue therapy and not break up, but he doesn’t want to . When we talk he says it’s his escape (doesn’t go out or have many friends) and I can understand that and have voiced that I do. But even if it were true, I don't deserve such venom. I have no friends or family, no money, no where to go. But because of my low confidence I cant confront her to tell her the truth. And if I read this right, you're looking to be absolved of guilt, right ? We are separated, but living in the same house. Since then, i haven’t been able to trust him at all. He is out 4 weeks and comes back one week, well started treating me like crap calling me names and he expected sex as soon as he came back after being out 4 weeks, he didn't even care if I was enjoying it or not, so I didn't wanted it anymore so he started calling me names and telling me in my face how he had paid my rent twice and fixed my car twice!!! But i feel i can’t trust him, that he doesn’t realise he has weaknesses too that I don’t dwell on. If you feel as if you are alone or would rather be alone than in your relationship, obviously, somehow your relationship is flawed. In summary, there are deep-rooted issues here. Finally at afternoon I called him & asked who that girl was, he said very easily that there was nothing serious, she was just a childhood friend. He's truly Indeed a God on Earth. What should I do, I am so done being abused and talking to him about it is like talking to the wall so he will never change. Our kid got hurt and he wouldn’t answer the phne. . We hope that helps. I just don't feel he's the guy for me. We weren’t together for 11 months before he decided to come back. I don’t see a way out. We do highly recommend you seek support yourself as the transition to finding your sense of identity outside of codependency can be a challenge. Witchcraft love spells, voodoo love spells, black magic love spells, binding love spells, marriage love spells, white magic love spells, divorce spells, spells for lost love, love spells that work fast, love spells for men, love spells for women, love potions, love muti, love rings, badluck removal, witchcraft spells, wiccan love spells, wicca love spells, traditional healing, divination & voodoo magic for love and lost love, email Dr Olorun Agbalazzy now: olorunoduduwaspiritualtemple@ g m a i l . Relationships are tough and there are rarely answers right for everyone. and hes manipulative. Get help. No one does. 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